...That I learned from Robert Heinlein.
1. Lazarus Long is ugly.
2. Old people are awesome.
3. Did I mention Lazarus Long is ugly?
4. Artificial Intelligences are always fucking awesome.
5. The Moon is a better place to live than Earth.
6. In fact, any planet is better.
7. If your name is Howard, you're going to live a long time. A really long time.
8. Seriously, a really really long time.
9. Lazarus Long is still ugly, you know.
10. One-armed computer mechanics are awesome.
11. They walk dogs, too.
12. My head hurts. I'll think of more later. Wait, I've got one -
13. Lazarus Long is ugly.
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